Some Thoughts

I realize that “Psalms of Lament” has been front and center on the blog for many months now.  Not that lament doesn’t have its place in life, but I’m ready to move on to something a bit more uplifting!

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to lead a weekend retreat focused on spiritual practices.  We considered practices we might use during the season of Lent that bring us beyond the typical Lenten practices of sacrifice and self-denial.  Those certainly have their place, but I think we limit our Lenten experience if we focus only on those.

One of my favorite images of the Lenten season is Barbara Brown Taylor’s description of Lent as a “springtime for the soul.”  This reminds me that Lent is about so much more than giving up chocolate or swear words.  The season of Lent calls us to a greater awareness of God’s presence.  Just as Moses, Elijah, and Jesus all encountered God during their 40 days in the wilderness, we, too, look for new ways to encounter God in our lives during these 40 days of Lent.  It is also a time for us to allow our souls to blossom.

May this Lent be a springtime for your soul!

Last Sunday, we discussed the relationship between lament and healing, and where God is in that process.  At the end of class, the kids wrote a Psalm of lament.  I’ve printed a couple of them below.  It was an interesting conversation, considering how we can have faith and trust in God’s everlasting love even in the midst of tragedy and turmoil.

God, our Lord, hear us say,

Earthquakes shake us into despair.

Earthquakes jumble up our lives, and set fire to our hearts.

God, our Lord, hear us say,

Stop the earthquakes and make our day.

We know you can, we know you will, so please help our earth stay still.

O God, thank you for all you have given us.

You have taken the means of life, the food on our table, the warmth from our home, and the hope from our lives.

We now have nothing.

Look down to us who need your help and love.

We know you, God, will never turn your back on us.

Interesting that was my last post, over a year ago.  Much has happened in the past year!  I’m happy to report that my “renewal” meeting this summer went much more smoothly, and things seem to be rolling in the right direction for my eventual ordination.  It’s been a long time coming, and I’m excited to be a step closer in the process.  Though I am aware that there are many more hurdles to jump!

I am preparing to co-officiate my first wedding this weekend.  I’m so excited, not just to be officiating, but to simply be a part of what will certainly be a beautiful day.  Karna is the friend I have known the longest – since we were about 5, I believe – and I am so thrilled for both her and Chris.  Weddings are one of those joys of ministry; it is such a priviledge to help two amazing people begin their lives together.

I like to think that I am pretty good at “rolling with the punches.”  If something doesn’t go quite the way I had planned, or if something unexpected comes up, I usually do a good job of adapting, and making the best of the situation.

Last Friday, however, I had an important meeting that did not go well at all, and I am doing a really bad job of “rolling with the punches.”  I keep replaying the meeting in my head, wondering what I could have done differently.  I’m mad at myself and the others who were present.  It has put me in a horrible mood . . . yes, you’re really glad you aren’t living at my house right now!

I have done two things to combat my foul mood.  First, I’m taking action.  I’m going to have another meeting with some key players to discuss what happened on Friday.  Second, I’m spending a lot of time focusing on the blessings in my life.  Yes, I had a bad meeting.  But, thankfully, one bad meeting does not shape my life.  God has filled my life with so much joy – how can I keep from dancing in the morning, even if the night has been filled with tears?

What are the blessings in your life?  How does God bring life and love and laughter even when things don’t seem to be going well?

Because spending a week in New Orleans with 26 high school youth in mid-June wasn’t quite enough excitement for my month, for the last week of June, I went to Sonoma County with 10 middle schoolers for three days of volunteer work.  Overall, we had a great trip.  Though I never ceased to be amazed at how messy 10 kids can be, and I don’t want to say “Please wash your dishes” for another year, they did some really good work while we were there.

For me, the most interesting work site was the Harvest for the Hungry Garden.  This 2 acre garden, located in east Santa Rosa, is completely cared for by volunteers.  The volunteers come to the garden four mornings a week to water, weed, plant, harvest, and all of the other duties that are necessary at a garden.  Everything they grow, they donate to local food banks, homeless shelters, and other places that offer hot meals to those in need.  The garden itself was quite a sight to behold.  Then, when I began to think about the great fresh food they are able to give away, I couldn’t help but recognize the presence of God in that place.

Below, four of the kids work with the compost pile.  Later, they were able to spread the fresh soil in the garden.

I just returned from a week in New Orleans with 26 high school youth from our church.  We were there to help with the rebuilding process that continues following Hurricane Katrina.  The last significant time I spent in New Orleans was in the summer of 2006 – less than a year after Katrina.  I was curious to see what had been done in the city in the last three years.

As it turns out, I was both uplifted and saddened by what I saw.  Uplifted because progress has definitely been made.  There are no more huge piles of debris littering the streets.  There are people living in neighborhoods that were ghost towns three years ago.  Even in the Lower Ninth Ward, one of the most devastated areas, signs of life are present.

Sadly, there is still MUCH work to be done.  The house I worked on, for example, belonged to a man who has been living in temporary housing since Katrina (almost 4 years now).  He desperately wants to get back into his house, but does not have enough money to pay for a professional contractor.  Because he is relying on volunteer labor, the process is slow.  It will still be many more weeks, perhaps months, before he can return to his house.  And when he does return, it will be to a neighborhood forever changed.  Abandoned houses still abound.  Neighbors have left who will never return.

And yet, hope is abundant in New Orleans.  One of my good friends, who is a pastor in the city, was able to speak of life finally feeling like it is returning to normal.  Though she was quick to admit that it is a new, post-Katrina normal.  The French Quarter is full of life and energy, and tourists are starting to return to the city.  I could sense that the spirit of New Orleans, which is such a central part of the city, has refused to be dampened by Katrina.

Throughout the week, the chorus of the Bluetree song, “God of this City,” kept running through my mind – “Greater things have yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city.”  May we continue to keep the city, and its residents, in our prayers.

Well, darn, I haven’t posted since before Easter.  It’s been a while!  Easter was a joyous celebration at Westminster.  I offered the Time of Discovery (children’s message) at both of our worship services, and also taught Sunday school twice.  On all four occasions, when I asked the kids what came to mind when they thought about Easter, their first responses were candy, bunnies, chocolate, and egg hunts.  Only after I observed that these were all secular observances did the kids respond, “Oh, yeah.  Easter is about Jesus and an empty tomb!”  My own two-year-old son now knows all about the Easter bunny and eggs filled with candy, but doesn’t yet know the story of Jesus’ empty tomb.

I write all of this not to bash the secular celebrations of Easter.  I love Easter egg hunts!  I am just sharing the observation about what seems to be most important in the minds of kids on Easter . . . and it isn’t Jesus! 

This isn’t just about Easter, either.  Recognizing the sacred in our often very secular lives is a practice that most all of us probably overlook from time to time.  Yes, we know (or at least I hope we know) that God is always present in our lives.  But are we regularly, frequently, consciously aware of God’s presence?  I hope you will take some time to appreciate, and give thanks for, the many ways God is present in your life.

Last week, my spouse, Camie, got an unexpected call from her dad.  Apparently, he needed a favor from her that involved her going to Houston for a couple of days at the beginning of this week.  After she got off the phone with him, she called me to tell me the news.  He rarely asks anything of her, she said, so she felt it was important that she go and be helpful. 

My reaction to this news was less than understanding.  First, it was horrible timing for my own schedule.  I was going to be in charge of 25 teenagers and a church barbeque on Sunday, I had a mid-term to prepare for on Tuesday, not to mention the fact that it’s Holy Week and I had a Good Friday service and special Easter lessons to prepare.  Having to be a single parent for a couple of days was NOT going to fit in nicely.  This was the worst possible timing for me.

Second, I was upset that her dad’s needs were superseding my own.  It was his fault that he waited until the last minute to call.  It was the result of his own not-so-great choices that he needed Camie in Houston anyway.  Why, I wondered, should we reward silly behavior?

After much loud ranting and quieter seething I – finally and thankfully – got a grip.  And then I realized – shamefully and guiltily – how horrible my reaction had been.  Why were my needs suddenly so much more important than everyone else’s?  Why was I judging a situation I actually knew very little about?  Why was I being so unsupportive of a loving attempt to help a family member in need?  Ugh – I was not very happy with myself, to put it mildly.

It was, however, a great reminder about how difficult it is sometimes to live and act in the loving manner that God calls us to live.  I know in my mind and in my heart that God calls me to have a generous and caring spirit.  In fact, I teach that lesson at church each and every Sunday!  But then a situation like this arises, and all of the angry, spiteful, self-centered parts of me rise up and let out a giant roar . . . just in case I have forgotten that they are there!

As it turns out, Camie ended up not even having to go to Houston.  And she received my apology for how I had behaved with love and forgiveness.  But my lesson has been learned.  I can certainly talk the talk, but I still need work on walking the walk.  Especially this weekend, as we put special focus on the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus, may we also focus on how we can continue to follow more closely Jesus’ example of living with love and grace.

I just cleaned off my desk.  I know that may not sound like a big deal, but it was quite a wonderful accomplishment for me.  I had been working surrounded by piles that kept getting bigger and bigger.  Not only did my desk look sloppy, but it nagged at me constantly.  What if there was something in those piles that was important . . . that I was forgetting?

As it turns out, almost everything in my piles was recyclable.  Just stuff I had been hanging on to for no reason.  It got me thinking, though, about other stuff I am hanging on to.  Old habits that don’t serve me well anymore.  Old ways of doing and being that need some revamping.  Old gripes or pains that need forgiving.  As I clear off my desk, and then look outside to see the many signs of spring, I remember that I began Lent saying that it would be a “springtime for my soul.”  In general, Lent has been just that, but with spring comes spring cleaning, and I think it’s time for that now!

What in your life could use a little spring cleaning?

Yesterday evening, my son and I spent a long time looking at a caterpillar.  It was quite small, and if I had been alone, I probably would have walked right by it without giving it a second thought.  For Ben, though, the caterpillar was the most fascinating creature he had seen all day.  He squealed every time it moved, wanted to touch it (though we had to have a lesson on being gentle), and even tried holding it.  And then, he talked about his encounter with the caterpillar the rest of the night.

I was really taken by Ben’s complete joy in such a simple thing.  The caterpillar did not have flashing lights or fun noises.  It wasn’t made by Fisher Price, nor did it come with special effects.  But watching the caterpillar brought him incredible joy.  It made me think about how often I stop to enjoy the simple things . . . probably not often enough.  Especially when living in today’s world with an uncertain economic future, what a gift it is to be able to pause and give thanks for a caterpillar!  What simple thing brought you joy today?

“‘Tis the gift to be simple, ’tis the gift to be free . . .” – Joseph Brackett